Arts and Crafts

The Hysterical Way an Automatic Coffee Maker Completely Saved Christmas for This Mom

Many parents depend on their coffee maker on Christmas morning
for giving them the energy they’ll need to enthusiastically get
through an early morning after a late night of making holiday
magic happen. As a mom of three, Sarah Cottrell was one of
those grateful parents come Christmas morning but for a
completely different reason. When her night was going to hell,
her glorious automatic coffee maker miraculously kicked in and
not only scared the shit out of her sneaky 8-year-old, but also
convinced him that Santa is alive and well.

The mom behind the blog Housewife Plus explained her
exasperating yet hysterical night in a Facebook post that
detailed what happened after she tried getting her boys to
sleep on Christmas Eve. “My kids were predictably bonkers and
getting them to bed was something of a challenge. After bribes,
threats, and straight-up pleading, my husband and I finally got
the boys to sleep,” she wrote. “Then we got to work. We did all
the stuff that parents do on Christmas Eve while kids are
sleeping. It’s not easy making a basic living room into a
magical wonderland by dawn. But we do our best.”

Once she finally got the last of the Christmas loot set up
downstairs, Cottrell snuck upstairs to get some
much-needed sleep. But only a few minutes later, Finn snuck in
her room and excitedly woke her up asking if it was time for
presents yet. “He was inches from my nose so I’m glad that when
he startled me awake I didn’t actually bolt upright because it
would have knocked one of us out,” she wrote. “I tried to get
him to go to bed but of course, that wasn’t going to happen
without a veritable ton of bribery.” 


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So she offered to snuggle him back to sleep but as most parents
know, it wasn’t that easy. “Seconds later, I’m in my son’s bed
staring at the ceiling and whispering over and over, ‘No, you
can’t have more water, no, you can’t check on the dogs to see
if they are sleeping. No, you do not have to pee. No, you
don’t. No. You. Do. Not. FINE! I’ll get you a pee jar,'” she
wrote. “I got up and found a Mason jar for him to pee into.
There was no way I was going to let him go downstairs and see
everything that was waiting for morning. Nope. So pee jar it

Finn’s excuses for needing to get up and go downstairs only
became more elaborate as the clock ticked past 4:00 a.m.
without ever falling asleep. “I was exhausted and desperate for
just six minutes of rest so when I heard the coffee maker
automatically go off and start brewing, I knew I had an
opportunity to get my kid to quiet down and be still,” she
wrote. “I turned my face toward my son and I whisper-screamed,
‘OHMYGAWD!!! DO YOU HEAR THAT?!’ His eyes got huge. The coffee
maker was making these low rumbling sounds that with a little
bit of suggestion sure did sound an awful lot like a big fat
jolly elf rummaging through a sack of toys.”

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Like the Christmas miracle that it truly was, Finn believed her
and he immediately went silent. “I had exactly 12 minutes of
not having to get up and of total quiet, because what kid is
going to spook Santa, get busted, then ruin Christmas? Not this
one, anyway,” she wrote. “He laid there with huge eyes and a
wide open mouth. He squeezed my hand and I was trying as hard
as I could to not die laughing. It was super sweet and funny.”

Cottrell completely forgot about the automatic coffee maker’s
bell so when it went off, she had to think quickly. “‘Oh! That
was Santa’s pager! It means his time is up and he has to get to
the next house.’ My 8YO jumped out of bed and ran to his window
before I could say anything,” she wrote. “Did I mention that we
live about 20 minutes away from an airport and there are always
planes circling low to prep for landing?” 

When Finn looked out the window, he saw “Santa” with blinking
red and white lights flying low in the sky and couldn’t contain
his excitement. Not only had Santa come but he was lucky enough
to be awake for the magic! “And then everyone woke up. It was
5:00 a.m,” she wrote. “I didn’t get to sleep but I got to lay
down for exactly 12 minutes and managed to make Christmas
straight up magical for one deserving 8-year-old kid.”

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